CONFESSION ZERO (The Weaver's Song)

The overabundance of fear that I hold is mine to do away with, I created it. It is man-made and I began my ascent with great trepidation because of the possibilities I’d suffer if I fell- my family, my friends, humankind… I no longer tolerate the use of fear from myself. My self is making up for lost time, but time is in the head, not in God. I do not fear death, save where safety is undesirable over righteousness! My fear of death, and I do not, I use my fear of life, my fear of death has been vanquished by Love… It doesn't take me but a second now to remember where I am... Love, as one might imagine, has its roadblocks, much like my past transgressions, especially those that attempted to murder The Mother through my own hand or my own indifference, my own lovelessness. My destruction to the human spirit on the eartH is, in my belief, the gravest sin in the flesh that I, and all of humankind, can imagine... fear.

I bring me along at my own risk, but it is not just my risk that I’m taking, I’m taking my vow to Love and she’s guiding me Home…

I jumped just then to show these words before all of the others I’ve written but have yet to publish, it pours out of me like joy at the miracle of birth! Keeping in mind that you do not destroy Home and still have the audacity to imagine you’re going to the next level…

Clean this earth, Mark, and end your wars and your rape and your murder and your thirst and starvation for the unknown unknowable…

The powers that be are not what they seem my friends, each have their own desire, each their own wants, yet all with the same needs...

We’ve created our own hell, not the other way around, dear spirits, we too have found our way most solemn! Why should it be tragic, it is what it was intended to be, a test of our loving capacity. Why not? I don’t know, maybe it is a test we imagined that nothing could be using we thinking beast as a tool toward its own salvation? Our love is being used by whatever is running this, our show- Perhaps, I don't know...

Everyone is helping me along in their own way.

It is time to Love, my friends. It is time, and let us remember it will be joyous!

Do it fearlessly but be aware, do it gently, loving and with the whisper of truth…

There are few things that can conjure the mind further than the truth…

They’re one line packing a wallop! I can’t wait to meet the spirits that permitted me to scribe…

I am in Heaven, all else is beautiful and serene as if I'd died and woke up in hell, the one of our making and climbed my way back to the surface. I was blind, but now I see. I see where I am is most precious to humankind! Let us not wait upon a subsequent death…

Next…

It is painful.

In our thirst for Love we’ve nearly been fooled, we’ve, or better yet, I’ve nearly been fooled by the skin of my chattering teeth. Those of us that get scared around certain people even though they’re harmless, I believe it is, because, because they would like to just simply be and not be inundated with man’s foul noises…

Tick tock…

Tick tock…

Enough about belief, I'm going to be...

(Echo...)

Either way, I will return again to reap what I have sewn, in the meantime, I'll be good, be kind, be loving and trust in Love and God, not belief……

(ping)

© 2012 The Spirit of Love...

(I long for God and find it as Love...)

God has yet to be imagined by humankind.

I make my presence known through spirit, the spirit and that which I carry of the weight of another spirit and another and another that fear latches on to like a python clinching the collective breath. And, in the end, I’m probably just cast off into the living sea or laid beneath the loving soil, life eternal, the balance paid in full, the check’s upon Heaven’s table…

I am me. Love. If I weren’t Love I wouldn’t be me. There are thousands of ways to express Love without resorting to violence, without latching on to what I’m told I am, instead of what I truly am…

How hard can it be to begin living amongst my fellow stewards in harmony among the same species?

This is hardly freewill… this is free-fear. I must release all fears, rational or otherwise, in order to find full Love…

It’s a catch22 really…

This script I’m writing is being given to me, produced by the goodness of the spirits that Love had found on the way.

Beautiful isn’t a horrible word. Faith isn’t such a horrible word. God or Allah isn’t such a horrible name, yet what of Love? Love is the thing I must aid in moving into my dreams before I pass away again and forget, as usual. Be in motion toward my dreams and hope I’ve got enough stamina. I could move to my dreams at the dream’s pace… Imagine had I this full Love and Joy after such a long time of its absence? I’ll believe it before it wanes and is locked snugly away between twin fears …When I believe in Love, I love…

The spirits that I danced with are snugly fitting into my instinct as well.

“I believe” isn’t a “most of it, half of it or none of it” kind of thing, it’s more like overflowing Love found in me. There is no level save for full Love. It is Love, God, joy, laughter, hope, smiles, tears, kindness, brilliance, as a child of Love. What more do I need from anything misery has to offer other than the belief of the what and who and where I am in this embracement of Love…

(Echo…)

~

Again.

(Echo…)

~

(Silence…)

~

Again.

~

(Echo…love…)

~

The wind is funny within my story, it is as if all natural sounds are guiding me toward love and all fear that I’ve tossed in me is getting in my way. It’s on top of ME. “ME” represents the actual me, ME, who, what and where I was born to be. Home, as ME, in Heaven…

If only I could release myself of all fear? That would be letting too many go and one is the loneliest of numbers, but the one I’ve got to master long before I can even fathom who I am and where I’ve been all along, the eartH, Love, God, Truth, the belief in Love, and right about now would be a good time to begin…

The more fear I show the more that change will come faster in order to save as much of the eartH as is possible from me and the human-parasite I had become.

Let her go, steward! Release her of her chains!

~

It has itself upside down, this story. If I can know nothing more than who I am, it’d go a long way toward realizing whom I am…

This isn’t about my choosing, this is about the spirits that call to my better self, and, if I do not heed them, I’ll tumble down into Love to remain just a part of it instead of as Full Love.

Full Love is just what Mother eartH orders.

I do not think that I am anything but a man, meant to be born in Heaven, the Home I’ve made into hell from my image… Okay, Love, I am here, please guide me through for the nagging fear of forgetting who I am has me tethered, perhaps for another misguided round, release the fear, silence my mind! Please… For the Truth in all and everything, I must remove my fear, for Love is set to call.

Then, by all means, commence!

After you.

Thanks. Who? Love? Yes. Love? Yes. Commence! I don’t know who I am anymore… and that’s a good thing.

I think I put it out there in my dreams and it manifests itself as, anything but, Love…

She asks that I not forget my long forgotten story when I began and from where I’m about to land, Heaven, how could I? The eartH is my beholden and until I memorize and breathe that lesson I’m oblivious to it or just don’t care whether my grandson and theirs and the future be one that all can share by worshipping Home, understanding that the eartH and family are precious. I must hold them as cherished, but not from an awful use of my brain, but from me leaving Love set for the next phase in my evolution of change. (I’m finding myself inundated with Love.)

Remember its Love and that the spirits spirit, in the end, is one, I must give them back that Love might pour forth and fix a crumbling civilization. I must only hold love from another for all the right reasons, and there are none. I’ve lost the instinct of balance and if I’m “lucky”, or as fate would have it, I too won’t be lost.

I am nearing the tipping point, the balance is slipping from such girth, and I’m set to tumble into the Love of another, the next reel of my existence, my purpose, to tumble into eternity. After love, life and laughter I’ll go to God. There are no exceptions. I either always remember or I always forget. I pray I remember. Be sacrosanct in my belief, but always able to fit in another’s take on creation as long as it showcases love.

End all wars! End foul rape and murder and lies to myself and to others to carry on my back! My pride is getting in the way of my courage and my fear is getting in the way of me!

That’s too angry, scribe. Try saying it another way.

There are so many ways, besides it’s an exclamation point stemming from passion! See? I am choosing something that, in my repeating belief, is set to become one with Love and my wish, as far as my imagination is concerned, it has been granted. Sweet…

Have you accepted it from all others?

Yes. I believe I have, spirit, but only for a while now, ever since my dance with The Mother via The Grandmother via the Great Grandmother, and so on. My recent eye-openers have been tagging me right between the eyes with a glorious truth of whom I believe I am. I am love, as I believe I am intended to be, love for everything and all.

~

I’ve been adjusting to the host, Mark Richard Prime, the devolved beast without much cause. I am stunned these words, through me via spirits, are singing out for to me to come forth? Me? But this can’t be me, yet the fog is lifting…

For the love of humankind, speak! Human is what you are, Mark Richard Prime and you are now moving without your will, it was getting in the way of your upside down path from the one you were on to the one you are on.

The horse is more than just a horse when it’s carried humankind to this.

What?

They want to know the reasons.

Who are you talking to?

Me.

Oh.

~

Let my proof begin with my own change. Lose the dead weight and begin to soar as was intended! Rejoice! I am in the Heaven of my belief! Free will, ain’t it a hoot?

Boom Boom!

No. Take your thunder and put it to pasture, Love will do the rest.

See? I began to slide down and these words came to my rescue. I’ve been writing for years, lot and lots of anger, anger at myself for having failed Love and at having failed those who loved me and those who only wanted a friend. Funny how that worked out… Suppose if I’d have used only love?

Echo…

God’s swimming through me at a rather disenchanting gait and that is mine to own and then to dig much deeper to find out who I am after I’ve tossed out all of the rest, save for the love…

Imagine a lifetime of never knowing who you were, are, or were born to be? Welcome to 2012, ladies and gentlemen, we’ve been busy with fear on the line. We’ve been busy mucking the whole thing up for the rest of life! So, as thinking beasts let us begin a new chapter of eternal life. Love…

~

I suppose I was in search of my love and found I’d little to go around, so I sought out spirits that reflected mine. Freedom is the bottom line, freedom, freedom, if I choose to imagine that Love is speaking through me, freedom of all and everything to be loved and cherished is my goal. Who’d protest to that?

All is Love, all is God, Allah, Elohim, Buddah, etc, all children of God are christened to be the next one, but who’d be stupid enough to do that?

Bring me round to who and what I am and I’ll begin to manifest my dreams which are floating with Love. I can rarely recall a dream, and if I do, it’s a dream of fear. If I had to make a guess from how I feel, I’d imagine I’m hovering near ninety-nine percent Love. If I, as a human, get my collective self to center, I’d see that change is indeed upon me, it is mine to reap what I sow, after all.

It is mine to flow along with Love or be love’s immortal dam. I believe I’ll go with the flow…

~

All is going as Love planned…

~

She, my wife, is my queen, the thing I hold most dear in the flesh and her spirit dances in me with every waking step, I’m trying to appease both, Mother and eartH, eartH and Grandmother and her Mother, The Great Grandmother. She weeps for my misuse of her and begs I change my mind…

~

I imagine this rush of words will have to stop sometime although I pray they do not. I hope some have benefitted and are benefitting from their use. I am but to choose to remember now that Love is at its own almost unreachable juncture, and I’ve been grasping for a foothold. I’ve since landed and have been dealing with all of the fear I’d collected and held as my own, even that which was my direct contribution to those fears. I only want freedom from fear. It’s time for family and friends, and prayers and love. Slims down the chances of my influence corrupting my own or another’s singular individual belief, thereby corrupting full Love.

The sun’s in my breath, the moon my rest, as I wait for the next. “Who am I?” …I asked again and again until it became my prayer…

By getting to know my self, who I really am, I naturally moved toward Love as I saw fit, not something else trying to make me believe the same as another. Belief is supposed to be private, coming from within to my thinking and out to my actions.

That’s what I was waiting on, something was coming, and my instinct assured it.

Was it me or was it the collective spirit? I took love from another and left with their love for me in my possession and off I’d go to the next, not knowing anything really. I couldn’t make it out, until I could…

I don’t pretend to have any or all of the answers, I believe I’m sharing Love’s new covenant.

But isn’t that up to all of the spirits of Love’s desire to unite?

I’m just now learning what’s beneath my feet…

Love and I are wed to one another by default. Marriage is a contract between me and Love, plain and simple. Love is my only bond to the eartH. Love, for that matter, is the bond of everything and all, and if that is the case, I’ll receive some and give back so much more than that.

The only competition among fearful beasts is that of ego. I was not such a friend to the church, I was foe to those who’s belief I would sometimes trample upon as if I knew more than they, those who’s whispers now prick my newfound instinct. No more.

Mark, this is nearing the part of your belief that is urgently asking for more time…

Yes and the last time the traffic roared it seemed so much nearer than the other noises, but the “sounds” are the same song that have been playing for an eternity. I pray without an nth of confusion for what it is I need do, however it’s the answers to those prayers that seem to stump me. Belief can be dangerous when it puts weight upon the hands to do further damage to Home…

This is paradise, how else to make a chart of Love’s dancing music that now plays as symphony to my made for television script, the grand battle between sound and noise…

These are becoming commonplace, these, my truths stemming from my hands, but if I am given time to create an opus that brings belief to the next level, I’ll react because motion creates. If I truly believe that I can create Heaven beneath my feet, I’ll leave the rest upon the mounting garbage heap that was my thinking. I want to seek for that reason not war for that illusion. Truth is not mine to imagine, Love is mine to know…

Love, God, Elohim, Jesus, Allah, Buddah, Ghandi, Christ, Mother Teresa, myself, etc, names matter very little in the end, it only matters that I recognize my failure and want nothing more than Love, not for fear of an unknown outcome, but as a personal fate. Don’t get me wrong, I own the things I’ve done of my own accord, but I do not own this moment or this one or the next, I can own it, as in make it mine and craft sweet Love within it’s every word, but it is not mine, it is God’s. The next thing I would need to do is remember the lessons I’ve bumped up against and recall the smile in Love...

I can summon my own demise and make it unhappy or I can begin to recognize the truth that rides beneath it…

I spent lifetimes of effort raging at the dark, fuming in the shadows, only to be slack jawed by the next frame of truth. There’s a lot of truth packed inside of truth… and it’s indivisible…

End all wars. Scrape the filth off the hills and mountains and valleys and rivers and streams, and oceans and parks and forests and soil and all and everything and come with all of the hope that I can muster to have ever been lucky enough to have dreamed…

The droning arrives again, as if it’s known, my gleeful tumble down the pathway to and with Love. She is my guide. She’s been leading me beside the still waters of my mind's eye…

Where from here? I could go back to what and who I had become or I can imagine that I’m taking the eartH back for God. The eartH had become the hell of my never knowing, until I decided it was time to Love…

Did you think I was just kidding? Did you think I was insane? Did you think I was unaware? None of these questions are relative anyway, because they’re already answered, they’re rhetorical, not fact or fiction, just worth more than my indifference…

I will come with you if you forgive me for not feeling worthy of the honor?

Love, peace, joy, gladness, stewardship. One.

Echo…

~

Would you not stumble in like a frightened deer to deliver such a message?

Don’t shoot the messenger comes to mind…

(Silence…)

~

The bypass traffic sounds like a distant world existing just within my reach if I want it…

(Silence…)

The sun is shining just behind me, bringing with it not one shadow, yet fear waits by the wayside for when I need it…

Love doesn’t need to wait, Love is all and everything in your belief, so hang on tight, Mark, this is for eternity, to cleanse your mind of anything less than Love and be overjoyed and loving for the rest of the nows…

She begged me to listen, so I did, and only after she gave me several what fors did I find my footing and realized that I am being pulled gently along. (Thank you.) I soon saw myself moving, I went with the flow toward something mystical just outside of my perception and it placed me in situations that have been both wonderful and fearful. If I turned away from the spirit of Love, I’d have been left with only my fear of the unknown unknowable and I’d feel more like a spirit of greed. No, thank you.

Spirits can be much greedier than even known if Love is taken out of their worship and they’re left with doom and gloom. The words of Love for fear’s sake in these many words are failing to please even me. Begin again and pray I remember what it was that I did the last time, and change course, that I might help right the eartH and breathe love into her and breathe and love and breathe.

Isn’t it always time to be finding out who I am if I don’t know?

~

I took her love and walked away with it! No soul deserves to have their love torn from out of their grasp again and again, and then to again vanish at a late juncture and miss it right before my eyes, under my nose and beneath my feet.

You are the one, the queen of Heaven, I, thy humble servant. It’s time to allow the women and Mother eartH, to lead me through the instinct of love…

~

In this belief I see it ending several ways, but always and evermore to be the heaven of my making. If hope is expended with the eartH, Home, and she cries out for me to save her, I’ll come calling, roaring with love…

I’ve so much intuition blazing that it gives me pause before soaring and praying. I must ponder what I feel, not what I imagine I feel. I cannot imagine for another, but I can feel for another, I can have empathy for another living thing…

Truth was stamped in me beforehand and it’s always been. My brain brought things upon me, what I think, what I pray, what I say and what I do. I’ve thought it all wrong, I’ve come to “know”, and, what I “know” is that my belief can never be that of what I “know”, but only that of what I don’t…

I thought you said belief, in the end, became the truth?

It becomes true, but I never said that belief was truth. It’s just a creation of what I imagine to be truth…

~

The ants go marching one by one, one by one, by tiny life so tall that I began to grumble of greed and want and murder and lust and war. Everything is roaring. Something is either found to be real or found in the imagination, yet set to unravel. I was the fortunate one at the end of this wish.

You two are free to be now.

What?

You and Love are free to be.

Oh. But what of-

Hush for a while, child. You can always write, but you can’t always think correctly. You’ve lost your instinct as an animal and you couldn’t smell your way out of a field of garlic anymore than you can escape eternity. Newsflash! You’re in it!

~

If I know that it’s not mine to turn, I don’t turn it.

The birds chime in and I’m back in…

Getting to heaven from one moment to the next moment is my humble duty and pleasure. I cannot enter my Heaven until I rid my “self” of all negative spirit, mine own and those I took from others as they received suffering from me...

I am a man who has been swept away by Love. I love my wife, Michelle, my Silent Beauty. We love our daughters and our grandson and our extended families. Real, or not, love is what we’ve chosen to do. We’re inside of this dance with our desire to believe the loveliest of beliefs we’ve ever dreamed of.

We are believing beasts at the core, it is the thing Love desires. Maybe I missed the memo?

~

I love. I love the simple to the strange and the truth to the truth, for they can only be the love of all and everything. I’ve not much control over it either, but when I arrive on that plain of existence to face the unknown unknowable, I’ll take its hand and dance, because I’m the only one that imagines my belief is Love, as far as I “know”…

Move over and let womankind nurture for a while. I’ve plenty of work to do instead of mock the beauty in that.

I can imagine that this script must come to an end for the collective spirit has to begin the long walk back. She just wants to tell me that I’m moving on up to have my belief rendered and that I can still raise my voice up, the spirits have been trying to tell me and I’ve just come around to it…

I love you, all. I weep for the eartH under my thoughtless stewardship. If I hold her most exalted among my personal beliefs then the second I open my mouth, Love. Am I right?

~

There’s a rumble heard on high the lonely mountain top, remaining until nature says otherwise. There’s a multitude of swaggers that are not mine, per say. They’re the joy I had of spirit dancing.

What my spirits garnered from another has left me to call foul. There’s too much me and I. I don’t need anymore of this swagger come lately. Of course, I might have imagined it?

Where’s the outcome of a dream mixed up inside of all of that? I should be encouraging children to remember their dreams. It is my actions that have stood in my way. Love weeps, Mother cries. No more…

Love is set to land nearby soon and she’ll be placing joy upon the world. I do good, good will come, I do bad, use fear, or do wrong, I become fearful. Fear isn’t part of Love, Instinct is. Forget what I can’t possibly know and do what Love demands of me…

Love, I beg of you to come around. My fears were great, my numbers, me, all of the spirit I ever affected in my lifetime. This lifetime, not all those others before I imagined anything less than Heaven beneath my feet…

I’m being selected. I’m the latest product labeled caution in my ever expanding slough of the misuse of my thoughts.

Bang! Oh no, he didn’t? Oh, yes, he did. He blew through the roof like a mighty and fierce wind and began to shift his belief onto the nearest shelf it would fit and just enough that the neighbors might understand that they need think of it themselves. I hope that all they witnessed in my belief and actions was love, peace and joy.

HeartH, Heart and Home. If I were not beholden to the eartH in the flesh and bone, I’d be too damned busy asking directions to peace from a “God” I made up along the way through my dim wits. Dim, as in darkness…

Get out of the glimmer of what I think of Me, the I seen by Me and the Me seen by I. Think of it as a mirror held up to lifetimes. Do I imagine for a second that the way to make this Heaven is for everything to be seen as equal, if not I will need repeat this again and again and again until I know that my head wasn’t altered from a head injury. I was always the one that drifted about in a furious fog or a merry mist, ever-changing from sadness to joy, from desperation to jubilation, all in anticipation of a future exhaustion…

(Silence…)

Love and instinct, the two are not exclusive. They very much depend on each other as equals. Love needs instinct, but not instinct with an overabundance of my fear, only enough so that which gives me pause impulsively is garnered toward a loving outcome, not with so much fear that I’m unwittingly and even wittingly culpable of destroying Home for some fantasy land. The tragic part, I’ve been Home the whole time, I’ve just trashed Heavenly eartH and Home so badly that it’s become indistinguishable from hell, from any love found in my thinking...

~

I must remember the next go around and not forget my duty to Mother eartH, my beholden. She summons me now, imagine then…

~

Am I repeating myself? I suppose I could just self-publish a work the size of the weighty books of beliefs? But this book would not be mine and mine alone, it would be Life’s book and it would only have one word over and over and from cover to cover, Love…

Love, Love, Love. Love etched into both the back and the front and between. Love and my loving belief will send me on my walk and then into the dance and then into my affections inscribed upon the loving spirits. I’ll speak only Love, and Love will find me praying. Love overpowers my weakened instinct, my will, if I’ll but let her enter and exit evermore…

~

The youth hold the key to the dilemma. It seems that there is nothing that a hit show or celebrity or a new game or some headphones lost in song won’t cure, an escape from foul air and an even fouler noise, the personal grumblings at imagining too little. Oh! I was such an unfulfilled and unloving steward! My misfortune never looked so tall…

~

Move! Motion creates, and away I go with Love and her children as my light…

~

Move!

~

One, two, three and four… the echo rumbled, “Begin to soar!”…

~

The birds are crooning for Love to come and fix this mess. The fish are praying Love to stir goodness back into the water. Life is patient. The eartH is patient. Love? It is, but I shouldn’t test out that particular theory all the way to the tip of annihilation…

~

There is noise behind my instinct, instinct itself, I suppose.

What of the instinct of feeling or thinking, awareness, animal perception?

It must have taken one thankless story (or stories) to have ushered in enough irrational fear in order to create a very real fear that only the manufacturer of such noise can mend, save for God and Love, but there I go repeating myself again…

You can care for her as your beholden and have an eternity of Love.

(ping)

~

I’m writing five prayers at once! One prayer, love, times five. Prayers should never be sent alone as this will make them lonely…

~

Prayers of Love will lift my eyes to behold the living thing beneath my feet…

~

This seems a bit too much to be true…

~

(Silence…)

Why so quiet?

You didn’t show them how to be God?

It’s known among them.

Oh.

So it is known. (Have belief, just never over Truth…)

~

What is Truth? Can you believe the nerve of this guy, working it all out for God to judge when he is as clueless as the next?

I’ve been trying to tell it in order, instead of a tidal wave of words, that who I am cannot be forsaken by my belief in Love…

Only Love can mount such heights as dreams. I’d forgotten Love’s dream, and failing to remember has been my own awful thought and action, and it’s landed me in one hell of a mess. I must open my eyes before she dreams of love without me…

Oh! The eartH is most sacred, to God, and to her human angels all…

(Silence.)

Are you okay?

Yes. Why?

You referred to God as a woman and then you stopped talking. I thought you might have up and died, or something?

No. I’m alive. I’m good. I didn’t refer to God as woman, I referred to eartH as Mother. God is all and everything. Male and female, animal and forest and fish and water and the moons and planets and all and every star…

My new life and love are newly formed, be patient until the fog lifts and I will stand with you and hold only a noble affection in my intentions, in everything I say and do, every action and its equal reaction, every thought, every glimpse of a smidgen of sorrow, held up, etched deeply within my mental capacity and with instinct as its rudder that I might readily tire of stale ideas…

~

(Silence…)


~

The echo comes over me with a deep drone, sound waves, only they are formed from manmade noise. My life was littered with my rudeness and indifference to others, I don’t recall much, but have for some time now felt the heavy load of Love that I amassed and then carried arduously because I took it without the other’s permission. I’m just here to give it all back…

~

I don’t know when to stop? I’m not sure this ever ends, a loop that’s saying the same thing, using only one word, Love. If all I wrote was Love, without explaining how I came to it, there’d be no point in reading it or even debating it, because every word in the book would be known…

Have you even read the book of Love?

Cover to cover, shore to shore, everyday, every waking moment, Love. Love sounds like truth, eh?

Not really? Sounds like Love.

(ping…)

~

Other things do come up, but the blankets of kindness and affection are wrapped around my shoulders, I come carrying a humble love and peace to all and everything. I’m prepared to face my truth in order to know. Exactness might well be my Achilles’ heel…

Brave Sir Robin!

What the-?

Sorry. It just felt right.

It’s late. Goodnight my lovely wife. Peace and goodness be with you, my angel of Love…

(Silence…)

I understand lifetimes of hurt, so one is like the back of my hand...

I'm saying "everything is going to be okay" to as many as I can, I mean I'm not just blurting it out, that'd make me look like a madman. I'm assuring spirit that everything's going to be okay, and will be if decided upon and, even if it's not, everything will be, ironically enough, okay in the end of my belief. I 'm saying that there is no fear-based destination, or any such man-made concoction and I'm merely saying that I hold only Love and dream only with Love, evermore...

I do not know, I believe...

Truth is finally coming Home to roost. Truth’s beneath my every move and that includes my thinking…

~

Is it possible to create such a loving reality if all else are aware of where they are and I haven't been, then everyone’s waiting on me to come around, to crawl out of the shadows of dread and into the light of a new dawn?

I don’t know it to be true, I believe it. I imagine that it will help humankind realize their reason for being, I just don’t know.

How I picture the eartH is of the utmost importance, if I view it as a holding pen and not Love, I reap what I alone have made in my sightlessness…

I am to search, to bring order, that I may perform my sacred duty while I am here, not to allow the water, the soil and air to be tainted from my foul use of a slowly evolving brain. The key is to produce as much love as I am able, full Love. The breadth of the things I’m not aware of is shocking, even to my lackluster and left-over instinct.

If something’s eating away at me and I’m emptied of even a sliver of fear, playing God could get tedious if all my belief is able to muster is only one son of man…

~

Don’t know where it comes from exactly, or from whom or what, exactly.

It doesn’t make you slow, Mark Richard Prime, it makes you prepared. Remember that…

Instinct by definition is extremely vague. …Nature? Please... I haven’t seen nature of the variety that’s set to come.

The last thought that crosses my mind at any given moment, including this one, has a fifty percent chance of returning and I just think it’s a divine sound and I’m willingly plummeting toward it with Love in my heart. Who I am is who I have always been.

(ping)

~

Then rise up, by all means! Save for fear and war and rape and genocide and a fetid use of power. Anyone can do it while crafting a beautiful belief. If I dream the most loving of beliefs, then the heavy and love-stained hands of God will fall on me. …The thought turned outward, looking through my addled mind for truth, truth of who I am. The thought, though still teeming with love, shatters the ceiling of my most heavenly affections.

My Love affair with my most lovely bride, and so too to the lovely eartH to tend, to assure she’s not wanting as the next belief is brayed into the next and the next and the next and God must have been exhausted and I graduate with honors and never again fight another for what is believed to be truth.

Preposterous!

Pray tell?

~

The bridges, though many of them have all but collapsed, at least had the wherewithal to span the ugliness…

The birds are in synch with my sorrow and my joy. Their song vibrating inside of me with lessons I’ve yet to learn. It is the bird that underscores (in my neck of the woods), the blare of interstate traffic, a disturbing factor for Mother eartH to handle and handle it she shall if humanity doesn’t rise up and greet the day with humility…

Do not imagine any limit to the power of Love, God…

The bird must underscore indifference? The eartH has become a dumping ground and the bird’s song says much if I will simply listen. The wind speaks more like an electrical storm when the instinct’s afoot, neighbors, more a whisper…

~

I talk to myself, I talk to my self, and I talk to the self. I, me, we…

I ask who I am and what am I, yet I never question where. And the doozy of them all, why! Why have I become so indifferent to Life and why the wind just paid a stormy visit is up for grabs, nature or nurture?

I am meant to be here at this moment and the next and the next. (Stop thinking so much.) My mom has said that to me several times in my life, stop thinking so much, and in my arrogance I found myself unwittingly moving along Love’s pathway, how many years later should I have waited for Love to reveal herself…

I am in heaven, therefore, so is everything and all. It’s simple. I have the ability to create my own version of heaven, of ever after. I chose Heaven. It seemed the logical choice. I have been transported into Heaven that I might ascend my indifference to the eartH’s prayer…

Why should I wait to pray for Love? I must dismantle my fearful prayers by dismantling the fear from within them. Create a Heaven out of Love and I will have no need or room for even a shred of agony. Rise up for the eartH and Home, greet her with kisses and caresses that she might hold favor for my affections…

I thought I was a traveling salesman in my past life, trying to sell the world a rainbow made from fear, a cautionary tale that melts to Love’s touch and as one they glide with ease into another and another and another. Let them in…

(What of my loving haven’t I shown?)

The current dose of love is drying up, decomposing from a foul use of its source. It’s certainly not enough of my full Love! And I should know, I withheld all love until I chose to scratch my way back to the only thing I can possibly know which is the eartH of Love. I just believe…

There are those that have danced in a serious way with me, and they know who they are. I have done so to learn from my own mistakes and then strive to be able to figure in the part of my duty that I’ve failed to honor. I could have stood up and been just another of the many braying, yapping about things that only God knows, instead, I chose not to know, because the journey, thus far, is a person-changing, amazing experience. It changed me from the inside to the out and revealed Heaven beneath my feet, paradise being sunk by fleshy parasites, zombies, if you will, and that, in and of itself, is not an answer, it’s a question. A subject imagined by man…

~

Violence is a tool of ignorance.

Please forgive me for any part that I, Mark Richard Prime, have played in the eartH's extended suffering...

~

When I was allowed, as we all are, to create a belief system without another's influence, I chose to be swayed by my dance with the spirit instead of the words that this mere mortal man could have summoned from his soul alone.

I, from my dances with spirit, have chosen a belief whose end that I alone cannot completely paint, because it also belongs to you, and there are too many spirits that haven't been consulted, so I’m running a tad behind my own reality, or at least that’s what I believe I'm doing. If I do carve out my belief alone, I'll do my best to paint one that breathes in joy evermore, it will go on forever as Heaven if I’ve anything to say about it. Remember only that, and my human use will not have been as a simple steward, but as a child of God.

Being a child of God has caused me to realize that I could not possibly have much of anything that is known to present, save for that which is beneath my feet, the only thing I can begin to know. (I haven’t gambled much because I didn’t ever have much to carry around from flop to flop on the cushions of the unwitting….)

On the idea of great suffering, I must remember my place, I do not know anything, this is simply a belief flowing through me that I can live by and not give way to the continuation of murdering the eartH, right along with myself and others…

(Oh, but brother, you forget one thing, neither of us are God, but only one of us is sincere, instinct tells me so.)

I forgive you, and now if you’ll let me heal of my prayerlessness, I’ll have no choice but to heal my self and join the rest of the healed and become the subject of nothing but love.

(Mustn't you jump out there now and be heard that I might benefit from thy treachery?)

Slow down there cowboy, suppose there’s nothing going on at all and you’re the one creating the reality that you claim to be wary of. Stop your game and move ahead as scheduled…

(Scheduled? I don’t think so captain! We ain’t had his kind `round here since, who knows, since I don’t know when…)

Isn’t it clear that one must sink beneath their love into full on fear before the transition has chance of taking place? Start now, by not imagining the planet as just another planet to lay the head and, more importantly, by not slanting belief outward toward the surface, the peak of imagination, Mother eartH, but remember to slant it inwards first…

My journey has long now been underway and it is drawing nigh, not my belief, my destination, the eartH, what I hope to know, but can only believe.

Faith. Faith, my lovely angel love, faith...

(ping)

My neighbor, my brother, my sister, my kin, don’t you see the Love for the trees? Little dogs and squeaky things that go bump in the night have been the things I’ve had to deal with in my own life and as a child of God who never recognized where he was. I can think of no greater need to ask of you to forgive than that of the part I had in the destruction of all life. I must remember- Home first, then the self.

(ping)

There is no treasure waiting, save the one of the trace back Home. You and I are not the same, my friend, yet we are brothers through and through. My belief comes from places outside of this, our sphere, that we so gloomily our glee allow tumble as noise to drown out all heavenly sound.

(ping)

My friend, you needn’t concern yourself with the unknowable. You need concern yourself with the loving reality and not the gain from something so unknowable. Imagine…

~

Peace, Love and Goodness are not mere words on the page, they are spirits that traverse around in full Love, swimming in her every pulse, as she yearns only to be treated as queen, held as lover, protected as soul mate, and loved as a like-minded spirit…


Equal.

Through

And

Through…

Thieving of that is a grave error, brother…

I need but Love. It's rather simple actually, we need Love to swim evermore inside of us and we will, evermore, be in Heaven...


In the gleaming of our time together in freedom we watch the hand choose its own new beginning. It is strange that only now, as the world hemorrhages, do we sense a resurgent vigor of our treasured being. Our neighbors are holding hopeful that we proceed and that our hearts can quell the rumbling earth. They call to us from all around, below and above, these spirits that yearn to be loved, yearn to have love and evermore Love and it has, this, your hope, your love is all one need to bring about a transformation beyond your wildest dreams, what are you waiting on? These are the word's of Love. 


Anon comes our most extraordinary occurrence, which we, with wild modesty of our grand estate, do pray angels might hover within our strain, stuffing the dreary look with the consult of truth, and burst forth with a great cry of liberty that she shall, within our hands, forever remain.


Your hands, too, must carry this burden, Mark Richard Prime!


Yes. I am just asking for help...


Not therapy, because this, my long-winded prayer is the only reason I'm even talking...


The traps been set, as a matter of fact, it's snapped, and the slings and arrows do fall all about in loveless actions meant as ruse...

To my family I pray, release me of this with your voices, too! I mean rafter-sized loving voices that swim in a numbness like the rest of us, I too have tumbled to fear and in this, my unrealized, unknown instinct, I kept trying to tell my self and not myself and found it even harder to tell someone else...

Today is a new day.

Praise Love. GodLove. our newfound covenant...

To achieve what war cannot, dislodge the facts, usher in hope and create breath.

To create what the warrior cannot, usher in dreams, wage peace, save love.

To carry the lode that liars cannot, use words of wisdom, grains of trust and the truth.

It is not an issue of one knowing the truth of war, but rather the ability of one not to wage it.